Mad Mental Mario

In a belated follow-up to that wee video of Monty Mole that I linked to a long while back, I thought I would post something utterly fantastic that I stumbled across the other day...



By jiminy, there is clearly nowhere near enough of that kind of thing being made in the world today, something that I intend to redress imminently with my own re-creation of Leisure Suit Larry in the Land of the Naked German Art Students. You have been warned !

Better late than never

Two belated things that I really ought to have mentioned in dispatches from the previous couple of weeks. First of all, muchly enjoyed the BDO darts on the Beeb, especially the title win from Ted "The Count" Hankey, the man with what is, quite frankly, the best walk on in darts...



The other thing, sadly, was to mourn the loss of the mighty Ricardo Montalban, whose passing prompted nerds all over the world to simutaneously grab their communicators (?!) and angrily proclaim Khaaan!!!!!!!!!!!*

*Actually, I looked up at the sky while crossing the squinty bridge, stopped and shouted "Boss, the plane! the plane!" to much bemused indifference. Bah, fucking philistines...

High Resolution(s) (Mode 2)

What can I say, seems that it's the time of year again to make public my resolutions for the coming annus mirabilis in a desperate attempt to shame myself into just possibly keeping some of them... which actually seems to have bloody well worked last year as, miraculously, I was a really good boy and somehow kept all of of the buggers (yes, every single last fecking one of 'em!). Yippee-ki-ay, melon farmers !!! So, suitably emboldened, it's once more into the breach, etc...

1. I must avoid buying an iPod. My loyal old Creative Zen is finally dying on its well proportioned backside after four years and one feckless drop from a great height too many. Much like myself, the short term memory is fecked (it doesn't "remember" what track that you'd last listened to in the current playlist when you shut it down) and it is crashing with increasingly alarming regularity. Rats. Now, I've generally always regarded the Apple offering as a beautiful looking but hideously overpriced trend junkie plaything... however, my mate Stevo at work got himself an iPod Touch for his Christmas and, frankly, in the flesh it is a glorious beast to behold, incredibly easy to use and oh, so pretty. Must... resist... must... resist... must.. resist... (actually, let's face it, given that not doing so would involve Uncle Mex possibly spending money in some form, this is probs a very safe bet to get kept, I'd say)
   
   
2. Learn to schpeak (a little) Dutch. Yesch, of coursch! In April, I'm heading over to the Roadburn Festival in Tilburg, the premier Doom / Stoner metal boutique gathering in Europe (nay, the world!). Yee-ha ! Saint Vitus and Cathedral on the same bill ??? You betcha ! Crikey, I might even put in an appearance on the Thursday to see Amon Düül II if I can be, erm, bothered (funnily enough, I am expecting some feelings of über relaxed lethargy over there... in Holland... at a stoner rock festival. And I think my short term memory problems might just, somehow, be related... hmmm, any ideas, dear readers ???). Anyways, I know they all speak Englisch over there (exshept Schteve, obviouschly) but I'd like to go to just one of these countries without being an ignorant arse, for once, and make some kind of positive effort.


3. Write another bloody game... possibly even on a DS! Given the wonderful worldwide reception of contemptuous apathy for my blessed ickle Columns game, I'm going to do another one. I've still got tentative plans about doing some kind of shooter but will probs crap out and stick to, yes, a colour/shape-based puzzler. Not going to do it in Delphi or Python this time, tho'... I'm toying with the idea of doing it for the DS and may have to resort to C, C++ (oh, balls), or even, ulp, assembly... (anyone got a spare ARM946E-S manual handy ???).
   


4. Make easy money from "The Power" kicking a$$! Jeez, what did I tell you folk, it's like buying feckin' money. Don't say I haven't shared my simple wisdom with you. Mr Taylor is head, shoulders and torso above the opposition. As Raymond van Barneveld (five times world champion himself, world no.2 and someone regarded by Sid Waddell as the second greatest dart player of all time) put it, "I don't know what to do to beat this guy - I'm practicing ten hours a day but it obviously isn't enough". We shall not see his like again. So weigh in while he's still interested.
   

Aye, that'll do for starters. Keep on rocking in 2009, pop pickers !

Made with the help of -

Mogwai "The Hawk is Howling" - My mostest favouritest track on this whole elpee is called "Danphe and the Brain". Must be a typo. They say Danphe, I say Daphne. Danphe ? Daphne ! Daphne ??? Danphe !!! Let's call the whole thing off !